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Best Places To Meet Your Next Gay UNC Hookup

By Alley Steele

CALLING ALL SINGLE UNC GAYS. Hi. I’m here for you. I love you. I want to let you in on the absolute best spots to casually run into your fellow Carolina Queers and maybe fall in love (in no particular order).

The Campus Y serves as a beckoning ground for the queer UNC community, and if there’s one thing I learned during my time as a barista in a local coffee shop, it’s that gay people love coffee. If you float around the Meantime Cafe long enough, you’ll surely be able to overhear someone ordering a lavender oat milk cappuccino… a gay’s favorite beverage (besides iced coffee, of course).

There’s many sects of queer women. Personally, I fall into the “funky earring lesbian” category. Accompanying traits include sparkly makeup, bright hair colors and a meat-free diet. If you’re looking for this type of girl to take out on a date, they tend to frequent the Rumors earring section -- always on the hunt for some toilet bowls or orange slices to dangle from their lobes. As a romantic gesture, turn ketchup packets from your first date into earrings as a gift for her to secure a U-HAUL.

Beep boop. Beep boop bop beep. What’s that sound? Oh yeah! It’s the sound of any WXYC party, a breeding ground of gays and alt kids. A party centered around people who love music is the perfect place to ask her if she listens to Girl in Red. (Apparently that’s not real music, who the fuck are 100 Gecs?).

The sun is high in the sky, the breeze is blowing and through your hungover haze, you manage to make it to the Weaver Street lawn to guzzle their high-grade kombucha and tofu scramble and read the new Hunger Games novel while lying in the grass, surrounded by Carborro Old People who shirk the Sunday tradition of church -- there’s a high chance that another cutie could be reaching for the tofu ladle at the same moment as you (is the spark you feel love at first sight, or the hot bar’s shotty electricity?). Either way, Weaver Street Market is basically a Carborro gay club.

If there’s one central spot right on UNC’s campus that the Doc Martens gays congregate at, it’s the smoking flagpole. Wander up, split a stooge now and a cheap bottle of wine this weekend. Head’s up, don’t be a lighter thief. Lighter thieves don’t get laid.

This one should come as an obvious, but St. A’s parties are the perfect place to either meet your next queer hookup or recieve some very alt fashion advice from someone with chipped black nailpolish who smells like cigs but is still kinda hot. I’m 99% sure that straight people are tazed before even stepping onto their property. Nice :)

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